With online sites and dating apps there are so many nuances with modern day dating that it’s hard to know when to have a define the relationship talk.There’s chatting online, which moves to text or phone calls, casual dating which can last a few dates or months, which develops into an exclusive relationship, and then finally comes a defined BF/GF status. Because everyone has a different dating approach—some put all of their eggs in one basket, while others date multiple people at a time, it can be confusing which stage you’re in unless you talk about it directly.
Forming a relationship takes vulnerability; don’t let the fear of rejection hold you back.
One person has to be brave and show his or her cards first in order to move forward.
This nervousness and thrill is par for the course—and trust me, you’ll miss it when it’s gone.
Truth is, there’s no avoiding the pain of a break-up.
There are two types of guys in this world: the ones who want you to be their girlfriend and the ones who don't but naively think that's what they're supposed to do. There is something incredibly straight-forward and refreshing for a guy about not having to broach this topic himself. Maybe you're afraid of freaking him out if he's not "there" yet. If you've been casual for a while and the interactions are more than just hooking up after 1 a.m., my bet is that he's already thinking it and just hasn't gotten up the nerve to ask you yet.
The first type is the one who has taken you on actual dates. I remember a woman I was dating years ago casually turning to me while we were out with friends and saying, "I don't want you to hook up with other girls." That was fine by me. It takes time for a guy to work up the bravery to sit down at the end of a night of bar-hopping and just blurt out "I don't want to see other people. "I know, I know, it seems frustratingly easy to utter a few simple words.
So he's going to want to ask you to be his girlfriend—unless he can somehow convince you to ask him first. No awkward conversation, no wondering if the woman is already seeing other people, nothing. Perhaps you aren't interested in making the first relationship move, though.
But here's what's going through our heads: You might respond with "Oh already? You might respond by saying you're seeing other people and need to figure that out first, and we're going to be deflated.
I thought I’d help things along or feel better by asking, “So what is the deal, I mean, are we seeing other people, or…” It was a moment of weakness. The whole tenuous, if promising, thing collapsed on itself a short while later. My Break-Up 911 online workshop is going to gently get you back on your feet. And while I can’t purport to read your mind, I’ll assume you’re craving what most humans do: significance and security. And after a few months you really do want to get serious, and you want a committed relationship, then of course you owe it to yourself and him to discuss it. When you do feel the urge to have a meta-conversation, tell him (or her) instead about how much fun you have with that person, how much they rock, how attracted you are to them–and welcome those comments from him.